When my wife and I found out that we were going to have a baby, we were both excited and scared at the same time hoping that everything was going to be normal.
Des, my wife, expressed that she wanted to have a daughter. I had my thoughts on something else. As an athlete, I had always pictured myself and my son engaging in sports. I got excited over the thought of teaching my son dribble a
basketball, spike at
volleyball or do a
Pete Sampras at tennis. Of course, more than these, I was looking forward to experiencing that father-and-son bond.
The big day finally came when I held my first-born in my arms. We named him Martin Samuel, which means “I asked for him.” It was such a joy to stare at him, to hold him not only because he is an exact replica of my features, but more so, because I felt that my dreams were becoming a reality. However, we were not able to take Sam home along with Des, as he suffered a mild case of
Meconium Aspiration Syndrome. MAS can happen before, during, or after labor and delivery when a newborn inhales (or aspirates) a mixture of meconium and amniotic fluid (the fluid in which the baby floats inside the amniotic sac).
Meconium is the baby's first feces, or poop, which is sticky, thick, and dark green and is typically passed in the womb during early pregnancy and again in the first few days after birth. Sam stayed in the hospital for a couple of days, during which we paid him daily visits.
Everything seemed to be going well for Sam during his first year. Like any normal child, he learned how to crawl at 8 months and he uttered his first word when he was 10 months. At 14 months, he was able to walk and eventually learned how to run. However, we noticed that he would always stumble for no apparent reason. Initially, we thought that he was just having difficulty with his balance or that he was just clumsy. It didn’t take long for others to notice this ‘clumsiness’ because he began to limp even as he walked. Much to my annoyance, our relatives prodded that we take him to a
bone specialist. I could see that there was indeed something wrong with the way he moved his legs, but I was in a state of denial. What father wouldn’t? I had such aspirations for my son.
We proceeded with the necessary diagnostic procedures for Sam but we were not prepared for what the doctors would tell us. His doctor carefully explained to us that my son had
Developmental Dysplasia of the Hip, a congenital problem that occurs one in every one thousand children.
Hip dysplasia is the medical name used to describe a problem with formation of the hip joint in children. The location of the problem can be either the ball of the hip joint (
femoral head), the socket of the hip joint (the
acetabulum), or both. The exact cause of
hip dysplasia is not easy to pin down, as there are thought to be several factors that contribute to developing this condition.
Hip dysplasia occurs in about 0.4% of all births, and is most common in first born girls. We were at a lost. We were told that he would have to wear the spica cast for about two months. I couldn’t imagine how our son would be made to lie in bed for two months.
In the middle of this, Des and I became parents once more to another baby boy. We named him Miguel Antonio. We felt that we had too much to handle then as we were trying to balance our time and emotions between our two boys. While we were adjusting to a new baby, we were also preparing Sam for a major operation. He needed to undergo surgery because children older than one year old often need surgery to reduce the hip joint into proper position. The body can form scar tissue that prevents the hip from assuming its proper position, and surgery is needed to properly position the hip joint. Once this is done, the child will have a
‘spica cast’ to hold the hip in the proper position. If we were able to detect it for the first 6 months from birth, a brace will be used and an operation will not be needed anymore. That’s why for every child born, aside from the basic check up, an
ultrasound should be performed so as to detect this kind of problem.
On the day of Sam’s operation, we were allowed by the doctors to accompany him up to the operating room. We brought his favorite
Barney stuffed toys and we were playing while the doctors were making the necessary preparations. We were trying to distract him as much as possible, knowing that in a few minutes time, we would be asked to leave him. In the middle of the anxiety, I felt relieved when our son’s doctor and anesthesiologist gathered their team and asked us to pray for a successful operation. In that instance, I felt my helplessness fade away as I felt that God would be there to take care of him.
Two hours after the operation, Des and I got to see Sam in the recovery room. My heart bled when I saw him. He wanted to be carried, but I couldn’t. He was asking for milk, but he had to wait. Aside from the physical pain, he was wailing because he did not understand why we could not carry him and why he was wearing this cast and can’t move. He was scared and the only way we comforted him was through our kisses. I will forever be a fan of
Barney, Baby Bop and
BJ because they kept Sam company during his ordeal.
The next two months were trying times for our family. It pained me and my wife to see our son suffer. What added to my pain was that it dawned on me that my other son, Miguel, did not know me as I was too preoccupied with his older brother. There were times when Miguel would not come to me and that he would cry when I attempted to carry him. I felt I was a complete stranger to my son. But I endured these because I felt that sacrifices had to be made.
We encountered countless sleepless nights because Sam couldn’t stand the pain on his leg. He also developed bed sores on his back. More so, we had to endure the stench of his
spica cast because it was often wet with his urine. We even had it replaced once. But on the lighter side of things, Sam learned a few tricks. He was able to turn his body around and started to crawl using his now bigger arms. The pain was now almost gone and we were seeing the old Sam of sorts - naughty, funny and energetic. Soon after, the doctor scheduled for the cast’s removal. We were excited to see our Sam run again.
When Sam’s cast was removed, the first thing we did was to give him a bath. We also worked on some therapy sessions like stretching and walking. We did the walking in the malls, and the stretching at home.
It has been a year since Sam underwent surgery. He is now able to run, walk, and ride a bicycle without any difficulty. His bones are completely healed and are growing well. As per his doctors, his recovery is 3 months ahead of schedule. But Sam’s ordeal does not end here. On August, he will once more undergo a major surgery for the removal of some steel plates and screws that were inserted in his leg. I am hopeful that just like the first operation, this one will have no complications whatsoever.
I am still anxious about Sam’s forthcoming operation. However, I see this as an opportunity for us to bond again. This is an opportunity for Sam to realize of our love for him. This event also reminds us that we are fortunate to have the support and love of our families and friends, that no matter how preoccupied we are with our lives, they will always be there for us. Most importantly, it also reminds me that God doesn’t give us problems He thinks we can’t handle. If we made it past the first operation, certainly He’ll help us with this second one.